Glamour has, on its web site right now, a slide show entitled 30 Sex Tips Every Woman Should Consider by the Time She’s 30. I didn’t get through very many before I realized the tips were very Cosmo-esque…you know, trashy? One of the reasons I stopped reading Cosmopolitan is because every damn issue is exactly the same. And now it appears Glamour is going down this route. And since when is 30 the cutoff for anything? But I digress. Here are some of the cringe-worthy “tips”:
1. Explore Your Back Door – Eww eww and did I mention, eww??? Look, some people might enjoy that, and more power to them, but this seems to be one of those things that MANY people will not want to explore, and that’s okay. Just because someone told someone else who told Glamour that it was fabulous doesn’t mean it actually is.
2. Explore His Back Door – See above. Also, this is where I stopped reading, so now I have to go through the rest.
It can just make the situation awkward
3. Send Him a Sexy Photo – Sexting is NEVER a good idea. You never know if it will wind up in the wrong hands or on Deadspin. Just ask Brett Favre.
4. Fantasize He’s Someone Else – Isn’t that rude? If you have to do that, wouldn’t that indicate a bigger problem?
5. Have a Threesome – Okay, this was probably stolen from a Cosmo article from 1999. Again, as I said about 1 & 2 – if you’re comfortable with it, fine, but don’t take a tip like this seriously. I can’t see it leading to anything good.
The rest are your typical role-playing, porn-watching, bondage wearing tips that are predictable.
People have been recycling the same tips since ever, basically, and that’s why I don’t read those magazines anymore.
A Series of Very Bad Decisions 